It is the story of a prideful young man who decided he knew more than anybody else. It is the story of that same young man who arrives home, shaken and much wiser from his experiences of tending herds of pigs. He is totally prepared to freely admit that he had been a stupid fool. In complete humility he is prepared to say, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you, and am not worthy to be called your son.” He knew full well that he had pushed God’s goodness aside, and had allowed pride to take its place, and it had almost wrecked his life. But he was repentant, and he had a desire to make restitution for what he had done.
Before the young man could blurt out the last part of his prepared statement, “Treat me as one of your hired servants,” his father orders that the best robe be brought out, along with a ring for his finger, and that the fatted calf be killed for a feast. Of the many things we could say about this story, this is the high point: the forgiveness of the father. The father who loved his son, and who only wanted his son back, no matter how long it took and no matter what the boy had done in the past. And when the son returned, sorry for what he had done, there was forgiveness waiting for him.
Imagine if the father in this parable refused to forgive his repentant son. We would quite rightly think, “Wait a minute! That’s not how the story should go.” There is something in us that knows a lack of forgiveness is contrary to what God intends. To refuse to forgive is a refusal to reflect the image of God, and in fact it becomes a form of slavery. Even if someone has done something serious against us, when we refuse to forgive that person, we are giving them control over our emotions, control over our decisions, control over our actions. They now run our lives. They become our lords, whom we serve with our grudges, hostility, and hatred.
The word "forgive" means to set free, to cut loose, to dismiss. When something is forgiven it no longer has power. When a debt is forgiven, it no longer has any claim over our money. When sin is forgiven, it no longer has any power to condemn. But when we refuse to forgive others, we’re chaining ourselves to them in a perverse and destructive bond that ties up the freedom which is ours as children of God.
To forgive "from the heart," is an act of the will. Forgiveness isn't a feeling. You don't have to be in a forgiving mood to forgive. The essence of forgiveness is first in words, "I forgive you," and then to carry out those words by how we act. Forgiveness means we don’t return evil for evil, anger for anger, or sin for sin.
God doesn't keep track of how many times we come to Him for forgiveness. In baptism and repeatedly in the confessional, God wipes clean the ledgers of our lives. "If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness." He brings out the best robe. He puts a ring on our finger. He lays on a banquet to celebrate, because we were lost but in Christ we have been found.
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Painting: "The Return of the Prodigal Son (1862)"
by James Tissot (1836-1902)